To Anyone Who Knows Me Well Enough....
To anyone who knows me well enough, you know I am rather klutzy, disaster prone and have now been diagnosed with ADOS ( Attention Deficit OH! Shiny!). I'm a little scatter brained and having gangly giraffe limbs that can make for some funny and incredibly awkward moments. I'm willing to share one of the funniest days I've ever had with you , blog followers. Now before anyone wants to criticize me for using this as a personal diary, perhaps I am. But you're the one reading it, yea? So grab a cup of tea and hold onto the edge of your seats.
This story all starts on a dewy misty morning in the cozy suburb of Leumeah, just south of Sydney. I had to wake up at 4am to catch the 5:04 train to the city for work. I'm working as a barista/cafe girl/pastry chef in downtown Sydney and LOVE my job. It's totes magotes one of the best jobs I've ever had. I had some catering to do for Virgin Australia that had to be dropped off for 8 am so I was in to work rather early that morning. Before I left, I cut down a 4 foot tall banana leaf off the banana tree in Alex's front yard. I was planning to use it for the base of my platters. So here I was, at 4:45 in the morning, walking towards the train station with a 4 foot banana leaf in tow. The cafe I work in is a bit more upscale so I wear a dress and jewellery everyday. When I was crossing the crosswalk to get to the train station, three young guys in a car honked their horn at me. I nearly jumped out of my skin but flipped a bird at them and carried on with my banana leaf. When I finally got to the station, I was walking up a flight of stairs to get to the platform. This trades man in a bright orange sweater stopped me on my way up and said "Excuse me miss, your dress is tucked into your tights." When I looked, to my horror, the right side of my skirt was completely tucked into my tights exposing undies and all! I must have looked like a right nut case, skirt tucked into my tights and a huge banana leaf. And this was only the beginning.....
The morning went smoothly a work until lunch time rolled around. My boss had made a beautiful mushroom and rosemary pureed soup which was so nice. One of my co-workers was carrying a 16 litre bucket of the soup and lost grip of it. Approximately 14 litres of soup splashed all over my tights and dress and my other co-worker standing beside me.I somehow managed to get all the soup off my tights but 15 minutes it had dried out and my tights went stiff as if they were frozen.And they stunk like mushrooms which made it all the worse.
My day finally finished at 5 pm after starting at 6:15 - seemed by noon the day was never going to end. I went to circular quay to catch the train home. Circular quay is a beautiful station, when you stand on the platform, you get a million dollar view of the Sydney Harbour Bridge and the Sydney Opera House and all the ferries. It's a nice way to start and end a work day. So I was chilling at the station, reading the newspaper. I had literally just finished reading an article about a certain type of spider in Darwin (North Oz) that can eat snakes. As I was flipping the pages of the paper, I could feel something tickling up my leg. I thought it was a spider. I went to flick it off my leg only to realize it was a 7-8 cm cockroach running up my mushroom soaked tights!!! For all my Torontonians reading, you know cockroaches aren't too common a thing back home because it's usually too cold for them. In South East Asia and Oz, they're everywhere because it's perfect breading temperatures for them. So with a running cockroach that almost went up my skirt, I flung my newspaper and viciously started slapping my leg to get this demon creature off of me. When victory was mine, I looked around only to see a young couple laughing at me and a sour-puss faced old lady. The young couple had witnessed the whole debacle and were in hysterics. The old lady had only seen me fling my newspaper and release a blue streak of awful words that would put a sailor to shame. She put her finger over her lips and made the notion for me to be quiet. I wasn't about to explain the mushroom tights vs. cockroach situation to her so I just rolled my eyes and carried on with my own business. People these days, sheesh !!
The icing on the cake, here we go. I managed to get home in one magical piece. Alex picked me up at the station and took me to the local pub for dinner. I ordered a thin crust garlic pizza which was great. While we were eating, I was telling him about my day from the banana leaf to the cockroach in a fit of laughter between bites of pizza. We finished up and went through the main part of the pub to get back to the parking lot. As I was walking through the main part, a table full of ghetto-fab girls looked at me and started laughing. I assumed it was out of sheer envy (lolz!) but then took a double glance at my self. Yep, there was a piece of pizza crust hanging off the thread of my scarf. For fox sakes!!!!
That's all for now kids. I'll be updating again soon about the new place and all the other schnenagings that have happened since moving "downunda!". Until then, kcco to all <3
